Not off to the best start butI’m going to get there. My problem? Not watching what I eat on the weekends. I start out the week getting down to about 177 and find myself over 180 after eating out over the weekend. The only way to deal with this is….discipline.
Even when ordering food that’s “healthy” it ends up not being when I look at the calories. My plan is to start ordering off the kids menu and making sure I’m eating throughout the day. Of course I want to have a healthy relationship with food and I want to enjoy going out. However, when it’s all said and done, I end up feeling miserable; especially when I consume gluten.
Even if I do eat something labeled “gluten-free” there’s a disclaimer, usually, stating that the food may be in contact with gluten. Unless you are sensitive to gluten and dairy, you will never understand how badly those things affect those that are senstive to them. I’am sensitive to them both. As I type this, I should probably get tested for celiac. Gluten sensitivity.
My initial goal weight was 180 but I’ve changed it to around 170 to give myself some wiggle room. I havent been as focused on getting down to 170 over the past month or so. Mainly due to my final class which had me rethinking my whole life as a student. Pissed off was an understatement. I know 140 is the “recommended” weight for my height, but 140 does not look good on me.
Now let’s talk about Thanksgiving! Whew lawd the struggle was real. When you can’t cook and eat some real home cooking….let’s just say I went from 178.8 to 182.4 (over a 2 day period) LOL! I’m currently at 180.4. For the most part, my weight has been between 177 – 180ish; which is still within my goal weight.
I won’t make the mistake I did for Thanksgiving but so not beating myself up about it. I didnt eat, like I normally do, so I could pig out for dinner. Later that night, I ended up being miserable as hell from over-eating. I will do better for Christmas dinner though.
I initially started this journey back in 2017. I was tired of being sick and tired + being told I was going to possibly go on medication for high blood pressure and being pre-diabetic was enough to take action.
I decided to go to a weight management clinic (August 2017), which our insurance pays for – the co-payment. I weighed in at 246.1 (before going I was 248.6 or maybe 248.1 or 2) with a BMI of 43.2. My visceral fat was at a 16. Visceral fat is what you can’t see and can be harmful. Click on the link to learn more about visceral fat. Visceral fat.
With my having hypothyroidism, weight loss/fat can be hard. However, once I started losing weight through dieting and exercising, + taking my medication reguarly, I (keyword I) couldnt use having a thyroid issue as an excuse. I was offered phentermine (back in 2017) and decided to take it. In doing so, along with eating right and exercising, I was losing the weight too fast and stopped taking it.
We were going on a cruise soon (in Oct) and I had just bought clothes that would have been way too small and I was beyond my return date.
I’ve found some pretty nice swimsuits at the thrift store and some with the tags still on like this one. It’s a size large and I paid $5.00, give or take + tax. No, I don’t care that my fupa, panniculous or whatever you want to call it, shows. Until I decide to have the panniculectomy procedure done, I’ll continue to be secure within myself to rock whatever I wear. Otherwise, no amount of surgery could fix that if I’m not happy within myself from the inside first. I may not like that particular area and want it gone but I genuinely love me some me.